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Nube en el cielo
  • In the beginning, there was

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    land, hills, breathing steady air,
    rain that carried me inward.

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    Still does.

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    Loosened into water,
    I’ve never been disappointed by it.

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    I lived in the sweet noise of hellos around town,
    and the sudden quiet that followed.

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    My parents ran from one job to another,
    teaching me what carrying a purpose looked like,
    enough to begin carrying mine,
    and, occasionally, to prepare their lunch.

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    I remember my mother studying long hours.
    She, my father, my brother, my grandpas
    taught me the different types of freedom
    we can ask for:
    to see, to do, to choose,
    to refuse to remain unfinished.

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    In the many versions of us we can reach,
    rooted in duty, in a dream,
    everything begins again with morning.

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    We are.

    I felt most like myself under theatre lights,
    in the rhythm of a game,
    where being “weird” was permission.

    All that mattered was expression, its weight, its truth,
    the practice of a craft,
    the magnitude of a voice when heard,
    and the brave one trying.

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    In my room, I sang to Nirvana, Hilary Duff, and The Beatles,
    three doors opening to the same air.

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    Nights ended with a book open beside me,
    half-read, half-dreamt,
    as if the story could finish itself while I slept.

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    I kept the method.
    I often wake up with a smile, conscious of it.

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    Some days bent under sheets,
    shadowed by memories I couldn’t name,
    yet they returned and transformed,
    as if joy were older than sorrow.

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    I would summon the kind of rain only I could make,
    to translate pains that kept growing.

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    The whispering books told me about the places I would go,
    just before, just now.

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    I lived where nature moved, resisting, insisting.
    I watched a root become meaning,
    rise into the air,
    soften what feels unbearable
    into something bearably artistic,
    still alive.

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    My room, a bed, a theatre,
    each sheltered me enough to practise becoming.

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    Gladly: the same shelter.
    Words carried into the hands of those who stay,
    curious enough to understand,
    stubborn enough to make more of it,
    to make more out of anything.

  • I was nine when we sent that manila envelope to Buenos Aires:
    photos a local photographer had taken,
    and a cassette with a song I recorded in my bedroom.

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    Weeks later, I was one of a hundred invited to audition.

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    When the call came, my mother turned white at the sound of my name,
    while I cried straight away, hopeful.

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    I practised the scene they’d sent,
    crying again as the script asked me to speak to a tree in the yard.
    Then I sang before the judges,
    and the other participants,
    pretending to know enough,
    as if enough is ever a thing.

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    After a travel mishap,
    we still arrived before everyone else.

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    That editorial felt like The Library of Babel.
    My mother knew what it meant.
    They published us all in print.
    We headed home.

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    Trips to the capital became part of the calendar.
    I did well at school, so skipping classes was possible.
    Handball, my bruised-legged sport, had to go.
    Volleyball, swimming, maybe by choice, too.
    Acting classes stayed.
    Singing and dancing, half self-taught, half scavenged
    from whatever lessons we could find,
    kept the excitement alive.

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    At fourteen, walking on the beach, a woman stopped me.

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    Jazmín, model and TV host, named for the flower,
    asked: “Can I speak with your parents?”

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    Two weeks later, we were in Buenos Aires again,
    visiting agencies.
    I signed with Love Management.
    Friends from those first years are still the closest I have.

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    Some weeks, my grandmother, grandfather, and I
    travelled five hours each way for a single casting,
    returning that night so I could be in school by morning.

    Susana, a fashion designer, supporting my shared purpose.
    Carlos, going to meetings, always making it work.

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    My family hadn’t planned for this life,
    but they carried it with me.

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    My first flight was to Bolivia for a national campaign.
    Cameras met me at the store for the presentation.
    I was a countryside girl in a place I’d never been,
    excited to see cultures up close,
    watching the dream turn physical,
    admiring what life was placing in my hands.

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    Those trips didn’t just open the world to me,
    they opened it to my family.
    I was the first to fly,
    but not the last.

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    Freedom, as we all learned, is contagious.
    It depends on us to keep planting it.

  • Branches grow toward light:
    slow, deliberate, certain.
    They can also reach across borders.

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    I walked into rooms with a portfolio in a book,
    later an iPad,
    a comp card in hand,
    and always the same questions:
    What can I make here?
    What’s to learn?

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    Openness met me with shoots
    that began at dawn
    and ended under city lights.
    Covers with my name
    in languages I was still learning to speak.

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    The last-minute plan.
    The ready-to-fly bag.

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    I absorbed cities like textiles, like perfumes, like languages:
    their rhythm, their gestures, their silences,
    their untranslatable expressions and nuances.
    Each place altered my voice,
    my bones,
    my way of seeing.

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    Tube and bike rides.
    Loud cities, day and night.
    Amazement that refused to let me sleep.

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    Songs, drafts stacked in notebooks.
    Stories that bend my heart
    until the last sigh,
    until I let them go.

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    Every departure returned me to the same soil:
    my family’s love and effort,
    their dreams running parallel to mine.
    They are the ground that keeps each branch alive,
    the root beneath all I am,
    all I will.

  • Between departures and returns,
    depth.

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    In London, I found a different type of love.
    Friends who stayed.
    I had missed the smell of wet earth,
    mud on trainers,
    old buildings holding their breath,
    history that doesn’t announce itself,
    cafés with sticky tables,
    irresistible chips, stories, pies.

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    I walk this city in trench coats.
    I rarely use the umbrella I bought when I first moved here.
    Rain is part of my system.
    It doesn’t weigh me down, it wakes me.

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    I wait for the day I wear my favourite coat,
    the one my grandmother stitched,
    triple-pleated with chess buttons I adore,
    as if she already knew
    I’d be leaning into this part of the game.
    A season measured
    by the day I wear it
    to write in a museum.

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    Every morning: mate.
    Sometimes bitter, sometimes cold.
    The taste of home,
    a guide, a partner,
    while Argentine voices hum through podcasts.
    Other languages layered on top, a clumsy graft,
    roots twisting into new sounds,
    inequívoco.

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    My lungs feel better when I write,
    when I dance,
    when I drink creativity.

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    One thesis away from finishing Journalism.
    Late assignments.
    Pages full of crossings-out.
    Almost there.

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    Roots steady,
    branches stretching forward
    into the future I’ve begun to call fruit.

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    Madrid lingers:
    three short films,
    a voice cracked open by rehearsal,
    friends in Barcelona who still hold me.

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    Paris lingers:
    cakes sunken in the middle,
    paint that smeared,
    applause that bruised my palms at the window
    on lockdown nights.

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    All of these places
    left me balanced and off-balance at once.
    Rooted and restless.
    Every walk becomes part of the work:
    a gallery,
    a graffiti corner,
    a wrong turn that still gives me something.

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    I watch the birds often.
    I recognise the pigeons on my terrace,
    and the many kinds of people who live here, too.

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    Now comes the crooked bloom,
    the present flowering
    with scars close enough to mark the path,
    far enough not to block what’s next.

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    Awareness, acceptance, willingness:
    to keep branching,
    to keep flourishing,
    to keep living for everything
    that makes life scary and exquisite.

  • I love seeing people’s embrace,
    when sudden air turns softer
    just because someone smiled.

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    A book on a train has weight,
    more than paper.
    I find myself wondering, anyway,
    about the person holding it:
    their name,
    what they love,
    where they come from,
    where they’re heading.

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    Friends laughing,
    that pull to feel,
    the pulse inside it,
    the vibration in our moves.

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    A kiss that stops the rain for a second.
    Your accent, and mine.

    Wishes we don’t even say out loud
    while the fruit ripens.

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    It feeds.
    It bruises.
    It falls.

    Some are eaten right away.
    Some get left there and spoil.
    But everything returns to soil, eventually.

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    Each bruise leaves a seed somehow,
    waiting in the deep end of the surface.

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    Poems in notebooks.
    Drafts on flights,
    closer to the edge of life,
    closer to the hands of the ones who passed
    and still insist on being near:
    in an orchard,
    in a card,
    in a smell,
    in the sensorial space of memory and remembrance.

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    A journalist.
    A tent, the one we choose to tend every day.
    And the fruit that doesn’t last forever.

    Nature keeps insisting on being.
    What falls today becomes tomorrow’s seed.

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    This is what I make.
    Take what holds.

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    It’ll grow,
    again.

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